Enneagram 

I find this personality categorisation fascinating. Mostly because (to my mind) it’s so accurate. 

https://www.enneagraminstitute.com/type-descriptions

I am a 7 and my current partner is a 5. When I read the type description, and furthermore when I read the compatibility I am astounded at how much insight it seems to provide. Maybe it’s a case of confirmation bias, but it seems spookily accurate. And in fact has helped me to understand some of the relationship dynamics. 

My ex partner is a 6. And reading how and why our relationship evolved is comforting. 

My lovely guy used to be married to a 2. That’s my guess based only on storytelling g. Having just read about their relationship dynamic, I can now see (I think) how they paired together and why things are now as they are. It’s like a playbook.The other woman in his life (coparent) is a 4, and having read her cheat-sheet, I have a sympathy for her character. 

At best it’s a guide, at worst it’s dogma. But in any case it is a starting point. For understanding and actually… for fostering compassion. My empathy for others switches to compassion when I read about a proposed motive that is so different from my own thinking, and which i might not have otherwised “guessed”.

I suppose when the same character appears in your life what happens is that they actually embody a “type”. And you experience them as “he’s just like X” because you see the pattern of types. If you keep attracting or interacting with the same type; the relationship dynamic descriptor might give you some hints as to where you are evolved or stuck in your personal growth, and need to learn something from that other. 

Each “type” has nine levels ranging from “healthy” to “average” to “unhealthy”. And there are also suggested improvements or focus points for your development. I would use it as a curios or an adjunct. Or a way to learn about the differences between people. 

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