BDSM and negative reciprocity 

My guess is killing a human creates a negative reciprocity hole in the psyche. 

And so does being a BDSM submissive. 

When bad things are inflicted upon you, your inherited sense of altruism (manifest in most as reciprocity) makes you wish to give back the bad in equal value. 

I refer here to violent BDSM that pushes you to your limits. 

As distinct from play BDSM which is just two little tiger cubs nipping and pinching and spanking each other for fun.  

I am not interested in ever putting myself in a negative reciprocity position in BDSM in any way, be it submissive, slavery or dominant.  

Nevertheless, I find that others do it (submit to the violence) morbidly fascinating. Which is very different to wanting it to be me as the subject. 

In the same way people used to find excitement in watching others being hanged. 

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