Mudita 

It’s a bit of a shame that not many people know this word. 

Last night I felt intense mudita for a girlfriend of mine who announced she is engaged and 20 weeks pregnant. 

She is such a nice woman and so deserved of the happiness she exudes because she is a lovely person (to me). 
My heart just rang with joyous mudita. It felt amazingly nice! Like a big burning bundle of giddiness!

I shared my joy with some friends I bumped into. But I immediately (sensed/)felt the envy from one of them reflected back at me. Maybe her disappointment that she hadn’t got those things. It was a downer bump to feel it. 

Of course, I haven’t always felt mudita at other peoples happiness. Sometimes I have been the one to cry at my own reflected perceived failings. I recall being devastated when a girlfriend revealed her baby bump after I had just lost mine at early stages of IVF. It was a horrible dark feeling. 

I suppose we must all feel jealously and envy much more than we feel mudita. Which is why the word mudita isn’t part of our daily lexicon. 

Well, that and it’s a shit word that starts with “mud”. 

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