Ego is not a dirty word 

The ego is the part of you manifest in behaviour. It likes being in charge; it has opinions, shies from pain, seeks pleasure, generally creates a version of you. The ego becomes your personality. 

The ego sits between the superego and the id; it is neither, but shifts between the two at extreme ends finding a behaviour that meets the urges of the id, and the requirements of the superego. Constant compromise.

Eckhart Tolle is big on the discussion of the ego. He thinks too many of us use it as our definition of ourselves, which leads to a lack of true living. Being trapped in the mind. 

The death of the ego is the letting go of it apparently having control over all of you, and some surrender into acceptance or at least lack of resistance. Maybe this means being still. Maybe it means realising that the ego has played tricks and created stories in order to broker it’s behavioural result. Maybe it means lifting the veil of delusion. This probably requires changing your dissonance mechanisms from denial into change, which is energy intensive. 

To be honest after writing that I’m not really sure what the death of the ego really means. It has something to do with experiencing rather than anaysing. Gathering data rather than anaysing the data.

Recently while discussing all things egoic (which the ego loves) I described mine as male. It is in fact masculine as I identify with it. And I quiet like him; he’s a reasonable fellow. I do see the dominance and also the fear at any challenge to his rationalising. There are times when faced with the revelation of parts of him that I feel terrified. Such times as seeing a sexological bodywork counsellor that would make me examine some of my thinking. 

I wonder why we are so terrified of death of the ego. Why is it so challenging to look at our foibles. Why do we turn away from things that could help us grow. I ponder. 

  

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