Eckhart Tolle describes the “pain body”; it’s the part of you that thrives on emotional pain.
Essentially he describes it as a demon.
Some people, he postulates, love their pain body and they feed it and nurture it. They activate it regularly and live in it so often that it comes to define them. They don’t know any different.
His advice on ridding yourself of the pain body (should you choose to) is simply to observe it. When it activates just allow it, but importantly notice it. Observation and love trumps all.
And then you start to notice it in others. Their pain bodies. You can see the people living out their life trapped by it.
He postulates that as you let go of your pain body, so you stop interacting with others through their pain bodies.
Anything can activate the pain body. One such thing he suggests is the activation of someone else’s pain body. So the two joust.
He’s an odd but curiously guruish guy.