My daughter asks, mummy why does the elf look like a stuffed toy with a plastic face?
Hmmmm I very much dislike fucking with their truth radar. This is something that really bothers me with my daughter. My son is not as shrewd.
So I say well maybe because he is a stuffed toy with a plastic face.
But how does he fly to Santa then?
Well how does Santa fly to you I ask? How do planes stay in the sky. How do birds suddenly appear every time you are near… It’s something to do with physics. You’ll have to go to uni so you can explain it to me.